UPDATE [Weds, 11.01.06]: From blame to insight and compassion, not a bad move. Sustainable?
10.01.06: Woke up with this phrase, the promotional tagline for
Five Easy Pieces, one of my favorite movies (in part because of the oil rig setting and Jack's roughneck character, and my own experience with same), on my mind, seeing in a new light the film's ending, which I have interpreted in a very different way all these years. Finallly liberated from his worst fears and guilt feelings and nearing the end of his earthly existence, the Father mutely expresses his realization – enigmatic because he cannot speak and thus verbalize his feelings – that the Son has managed to find his way and become his own person despite the father's mistakes, the miracle is that Father has, in fact, passed something along to Son, but it's life-affirming, positive, an essential strength, that has helped the Son survive and thrive, not the "infection" of fear and weakness that he feels he received from his own father and that he was certain he had transmitted to his son. In an earlier interpretation, the Father's silence in the face of Son's confession condemns the Son for disobedience, for wasting the gift of his musical talent, renders impossible reconciliation and forgiveness, Father and Son remain trapped (together and separately) within a labyrinth of frustration and pain, bound by the past and their limited conceptions of themselves and each other. Maybe being able to see the movie in a different way indicates some positive shift in my ability to understand and accept my own life? That would be nice. Or, maybe this is just wishful thinking, seeking to let myself off the hook for my shortcomings and mistakes. How would I continue the movie, what does Nicholson's character go on to do after this encounter with the ineffable (nothing to do with the F-word, or does it?) Father?